Friday, April 13, 2018

It's been a while...

Hi
I have decided to start blogging again...

I started blogging a long time ago, and really loved it, but then I stopped working night shifts and my Daughter was born.

One removed the opportunity to write uninterrupted, the other removed the need to intospect; its amazing how the kind of fierce love one has at my advanced age for a little girl can throw ones axis off.

In the 8 years since she has grown, and so have I... sideways. Which is where the tale starts

I have had a number of health issues over the last 3 years. I wont bore you, but this has meant that I stopped exercising, and the result of this is that I am now much easier to see than I was.

Yesterday I went to see my GP about...stuff, and he did that thing that strikes horror into any 49 year olds heart...no the other thing; you can do that with a blood test (I would doubt the motivation of any GP who still does the 'finger test')

The rotter got out the scales...

Now, there is no need to share what it said, but it was 3 figures.

I am not a vain man, I genuinely have no care about how I look as the guys that mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind, but I do care about my family and my health, and when your GP explains in no uncertain terms that one is putting your life at risk by eating burgers, then I am gong to stop eating burgers

Wine however is another story. You have to have something, right?

So I am on a diet. I announced this to my lovely wife, who looked sceptical as I have often been known to disparage the diet industry as a sham based upon destroying someones self confidence to make money.

I am doing it differently though. To the best of my ability I will no longer eat cheese and carbohydrates. Bread, potatoes, bagels, pasta, muffins and cakes are no more.

If this works I will be happy. No one likes being fat, but we like nice stuff more.

Lets see how this goes.

Whilst waiting to get a blood test yesterday the song 'If I fell' by the Beatles came over the Radio. For those who dont know the song the lyrics are:


1
If I fell in love with you
Would you promise to be true
And help me understand
2
'Cause I've been in love before
And I found that love was more
Than just holding hands
3
If I give my heart to you, I must be sure
From the very start
That you would love me more than her
4
If I trust in you oh please
Don't run and hide
If I love you too oh please
Don't hurt my pride like her
Cause I couldn't stand the pain
And I would be sad if our new love was in vain
5
So I hope you see that I
Would love to love you
And that she will cry
When she learns we are two
'Cause I couldn't stand the pain
And I would be sad if our new love was in vain
So I hope you see that I
Would love to love you
And that she will cry
When she learns we are two
If I fell in love with you

A beautiful song, from an innocent age right? I think not... Lets do a bit of analysis and I'll paraphrase

1; If I'm with you, you must be exclusive to me
2: a relationship with me must include sex
3: You must shag me immediately, unlike my current Girlfriend
4: Withholding sex attacks my pride, so commit now to bumping uglies, or I wont bother
5: You are hot and I would like having sex with you, and this will hurt my current girlfriend (twice)

Now how this got past the censor in 1964 I don't know, but any Gangsta rapper wort his salt would be thrilled to produce a lyric as cold hearted and mysogenistic as this. 

You gotta love John Lennon right? What a humanitarian.


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